#1. I'm forced to get out of bed at cruel hours of the morning
#2. I'm stuck in traffic behind certain drivers on the road
Now, I've figured out a solution to #1 by teaching piano after 10 am. But, I haven't found a way to cure #2 yet. Have you ever noticed the types of people who drive certain cars when you're in a hurry to get somewhere? Here's my experience based on my own observations over the last few months:
1) Camry drivers: Baby-Boomers. They love their little luxuries and roomy vehicles, but they're as slow as the Manitoba bison. Stay off the road, Morty. Their car music of choice: Anne Murray.
2) Mini-van drivers: Young Families. They're popping up everywhere. They also tend to drive under the speed limit. The 'Baby on Board' signs should be updated to say 'First Time Parents'. Everyone will get the message: You drive slow and annoy us. Their car music of choice: Veggie Tales.
3) Crown Victoria drivers: 35 - 45 yr olds. Their cars get them from Point A - Point B. They also tend to cut off other drivers and take their corners at 80 km/hr. Probably because they know that if they write off their vehicle in an accident, they'll get a bigger tax receipt for donating it to a charity, than if they were to spend money to actually fix it. Their car music of choice: AC/DC.
4) Pick-up Truck drivers: 30 - 45 yr olds. These trucks tail-gate other drivers and drive 15 km over the speed limit. Ritalin and Red-Light cameras were invented for them. Their car music of choice: Garth Brooks.
5) Civic drivers: 20 - 30 yr olds. Cute, sporty cars that zip in and out of lanes smoothly and seem to get ahead of all the traffic. I wish I had one. A red one. Their car music of choice: Billy Talent.
6) SUV drivers: 25 - 45 yr olds. Usually heavy on the foot and high on pollution emission rates. These drivers like to scare seniors and other helpless pedestrians to move out of their way. Their car music of choice: Snoop Dogg.
That leaves me to ask the question: Which vehicle suits your lifestyle? Or which vehicle SHOULD you be driving?
3 comments:
You are mild-mannered, sweet, just plain nice and HILARIOUS!
You kill me, Michelle.
Good job on dissecting the drivers. What I would like to know is if there are women and men categories within those categories that you have posted???
What about the gerries that shouldn't be driving. They drive the old Town Cars. They change 3 lanes in a single movement, only problem is that they didn't know they did it.
Very interesting. Yeah, we're in the mini-van category now but we love our mini-van. So does Baby Sarah
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